Culture and Cats

I was still a bit groggy even after downing two cups of coffee and a humungous serving of breakfast. The Actress went upstairs to arrange her things while I took my dishes to the sink. I was done washing my plates and utensils, and I was already starting to brush my teeth when this hot Asian guy appeared out of nowhere, wearing only this skimpy, light blue shorts and a green towel hanging on his right shoulder. He went to the sink next to mine with his toothbrush, toothpaste and shaver in hand, and I cannot help but ogle.

He looks like those jacked and handsome guys you see in Japanese gay porn bondage movies with bubbly butts (yes, I took a quick inventory) who loves repetitively screaming, “Kimochi!” while they get screwed hard until they reach their orgokay! That is just way too much information for you at this early in the morning! Bwahaha! To add to that, as my gaze went down to his midsection, he had pandesalas in pandesal abs.  I took my eyes off of this Viagra on legs and went back to cleaning my oral mucosa. I quickly made my way out before I can tie up Hot Asian Dude using the toilet’s bum gun, smear a liberal amount of Nutella over his abs and eat him for brunch. I am so awake now, no thanks to the hostel’s coffee.

Our agenda for today is to go around Georgetown’s historical enclave and try to see the place’s architecture and culture as much as we can. Our first stop was not far from where we were stayingGeorgetown’s two-storey Euro-Asian shophouses . I have always been fascinated with these buildings’ designs and the fact that they are still standing up until now, considering Penang is already a highly urbanized city. I guess that’s one of the luxuries a city gets when it has enough land space for modernization and has proper urban planningit doesn’t have to mess up its heritage and historic sites. *Ahem* Manila! *Ahem*

The Actress and I also stumbled upon some of Georgetown’s famous murals. The number has certainly grown since the last time I was here, which is nice. I just hope they stick around a bit longer so more people can appreciate and enjoy them. It’s actually a lot of fun trying to search for these murals, especially those that were just recently made and have not yet been included in most of the tourist maps and guides they hand out to visitors. Searching for these artworks feels like somewhat of an Easter egg hunt for adults.

Our next destination was the Kuan Yin Temple or the Goddess of Mercy Temple, which I can finally see in its entirety. You see, the last time I was in Penang and I tried to visit this temple it was engulfed in incense smoke (yes, engulfed is the word). Kuan Yin Temple looked like it was some random part of EDSA that was sucked into a time-space continuum and was transported to Georgetown, Penang. It never crossed my mind until that moment that incense sticks can be despicable air pollutants. However, incense smoke is indeed great at warding off evil spirits… like me. Thankfully I can now clearly see the temple and take a proper picture of it. The Actress and I were supposed to go inside and maybe ask Kuan Yin for guidance, but we decided to skip it. In hindsight I think we should’ve pushed through with that plan because who better to assist me in my New Year’s resolution to be more merciful than the Goddess of Mercy herself, right? Unfortunately for all the imbeciles I encountered last year, I have not exactly been merciful for the whole of 2015. Nyahaha!

We made our way back to Love Lane and then headed on over to the Church of the Assumption and St. George’s Anglican Church. I uttered a short prayer in both churches, asking God to take care of us until we arrive back home in the Philippines. We were only halfway through this month-long trip and you’ll never know what shit might fall from the sky (literally and figuratively) or what sort of trouble you might chance upon in another country. It’s comforting to know that you have some sort of divine guidance even though you very well know that life isn’t rainbows and unicorns all the time (yeah, I’m putting out the gayest epiphany I could think of because people we’ve met thus far still have this mistaken belief that I’m straight and worse, that I’m traveling with my girlfriend).

The Actress and I were supposed to return to the hostel and rest, but we saw the Penang State Museum on our way back and it was hard to pass it up and not go inside. Anyway, the entrance fee is priced affordably at 1 RM. It’s not like it was going to blast our budget to a different quadrant of the universe. You’re an excessively stingy bitch if you have problems shelling out PHP12 for an educational experience like visiting a museum. Seriously, ‘teh. The Penang State Museum is a great place for anyone who wishes to get acquainted more closely with Penang’s rich history and culture. Trust me, there are tons to know about Penang beyond the artsy stuff and food it is so well-known for. The Actress and I certainly learned a lot after our tour inside the Penang State Museum to the point that we could probably give you a boring and lengthy lecture that will most likely lead into a coma.

We had lunch, took a nap for a few hours and we were out and about again during the late afternoon. Our last stop for the day was Penang’s murals. We definitely won’t be able to cover all of them so The Actress and I decided to visit as many as we can before dinner time and reserve the others for another day. Of course, visiting Penang would not be complete without having your picture taken with its most recognizable artwork”The Little Children on a Bicycle.”

I also saw a lot of murals that were clearly not the works of Ernest Zacharevic. We were told that most of these new pieces were done by local artists, which is cool. The only problem with this growing number of murals is that you really have to check out every street, nook and cranny because you might miss some of these amazing artworks. Anyway, if you don’t get to see all of them you can always come back.

The Actress and I also found our way into this street that had a lot of cat murals. This is the place to be for people who are obsessed with felines or for felines trying to disguise themselves as humans. I like dogs better because they rarely have problems following my orders (yes, I am a tyrant and I put the A in authoritative, so cats and me are obviously a no-go), but I enjoyed profusely these “catty” art pieces. Makes me wanna consider getting a cat even though I know I’ll probably pop a blood vessel when she becomes highly uncooperative and doesn’t bend to my wishes. Although I’m told it’s great annoying the hell out of them, which is something I could definitely enjoy doing for hours.